“I dig old books.” ™ Est. 1998
Quotations about Coffee & Caffeine Related Quotes Tea Jobs College Sleep Morning
This morning's forecast: 100% chance of coffee ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn I've just arrived in New York City. What a place! Just smell those skyscrapers. Had breakfast at a little deli on Ninth Avenue. Cheese Danish and a cup of coffee, black as a moonless night. Hit the spot. ~From the television show Twin Peaks by David Lynch (Thanks, Rachel) Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank. ~Alphonse Allais Coffee smells like freshly ground heaven. ~Terri Guillemets, "Morning out," 1992 Lord, give me coffee to change the things I can change, and wine to accept the things that I can't. ~Internet joke, c.2013 At this point in my life, I am more coffee than man. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn I went to the Coffee Club and heard very good discourse... ~Samuel Pepys, diary, 1660 January 17th I love the smell of roses Along about in June; And I'd hang around and listen To almost any tune; But the fragrance and the music That nothin' else has got Are the odor and the simmer Of the old coffee pot. ~John W. Fellows, "The Old Coffee Pot," in The People's Home Journal, July 1903 Caffeine isn't a drug, it's a vitamin! ~Author Unknown It's 6:55 am and I'm on my third cup of coffee. By noon, I'll be able to solve advanced problems in quantum physics. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn He was my cream, and I was his coffee - And when you poured us together, it was something. ~Josephine Baker The second cup of coffee is never as good as the first. ~Theodore Roosevelt, or earlier Déjà Brew: The feeling that you've had this coffee before. ~Author Unknown I orchestrate my mornings to the tune of coffee. ~Terri Guillemets Forever: Time it takes to brew the first pot of coffee in the morning. ~Author Unknown Serious question: back in the days before coffee, did people just basically die? ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn A fig for partridges and quails, ye dainties I know nothing of ye; But on the highest mount in Wales Would choose in peace to drink my coffee. ~Jonathon Swift Don't drink coffee in the morning. It will keep you awake until noon. ~Author Unknown Coffee (which makes the politician wise, And see thro' all things with his half-shut eyes)... ~Alexander Pope, "The Rape of the Lock," 1711–1712 ["A sarcastic allusion to the pretentious talk of the would-be politicians who frequented coffee-houses. These oracles were a standing topic of ridicule." ~Whitwell Elwin Be a coffee-drinking individual — espresso yourself! ~Author Unknown Replace therefore your morning-coffee by a hearty breakfast.... If you refuse doing so, then have it your own way; but in that case do not afterwards complain of your wretchedness and misery, and if the frame of your body should give way, then you may be sure that you yourself contributed most powerfully towards its downfall... those who are so fond of coffee that the very word coffee acts on them like a charm... ~Sebastian Kneipp, Thus Shalt Thou Live: Hints and Advice for the Healthy and the Sick on a Simple and Rational Mode of Life and a Natural Method of Cure, 1889, translated from the 19th German edition I make serious coffee — so strong it wakes up the neighbors. ~Author Unknown You are only as strong as the coffee you drink. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn Suave molecules of Mocha stir up your blood, without causing excess heat; the organ of thought receives from it a feeling of sympathy; work becomes easier and you will sit down without distress to your principal repast which will restore your body and afford you a calm, delicious night. ~Prince Tallyrand In America you can buy bucket-sized cups of coffee in any flavour you like other than coffee-flavour. ~Author Unknown A yawn is a silent scream for coffee. ~Author Unknown Coffee in styrofoam is against my religion. ~Betsy Cañas Garmon, www.wildthymecreative.com [Amen, Sister! All's fair in love and war — and coffee. ~Pam Brady, Trey Parker, and Matt Stone, South Park, "Gnomes," original airdate 1998 December 16th Coffee is a hug in a mug. ~Author Unknown I believe in living life one coffee cup at a time. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn Coffee makes grisly mornings bearable. ~Terri Guillemets I can’t stop drinking the coffee. I stop drinking the coffee, I stop doing the standing and the walking and the words-putting-into-sentence doing. ~Amy Sherman-Palladino and Daniel Palladino, Gilmore Girls, "Luke Can See Her Face," season 4, episode 20, original airdate 2004 May 4th, spoken by the character Lorelai Gilmore Coffee, and I'm a warrior Tea, a philosopher Wine, a lover Water, a napper. ~Terri Guillemets Lists "coffee" as family member when filling out forms. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn As a rule, I do not approve of messing around with coffee. No sugar, no milk, no chocolate, hazelnuts, cinnamon, no nothing.... Just drink it black, the way God does. ~Clay Thompson, “I put egg shells in my coffee,” The Arizona Republic, August 2014 There's nothing sweeter than a cup of bitter coffee. ~Rian Aditia I like her bitter as I can git 'er, along with a piece of pie. ~Jim Hovendick You know you've been playing too much Nethack when you refer to coffee as a potion of sleep resistance. ~Sweeney Todd Lundgren I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. ~Ronald Reagan Coffee, coffee, coffee coffee, coffee. Everyone shut up. Coffee! ~Internet meme, "A poem for mornings," c.2015 Coffee is my better half. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn ["Whoa. You're only half coffee??" ~@sarahmceneaney The steaming mug greeted her "Coffee-doodle–doo!" "Good morning," said she, "I love donuts too." ~Terri Guillemets, "Fantasy date," 2002 Man does not live by coffee alone. Have a danish. ~Author Unknown Sometimes when I over-indulge in coffee, it is as if I hear with other organs besides those of hearing. I startle easily, before the actual noise happens. ~Georg Christoph Lichtenberg (1742–1799), "The Character of a Person of my Acquaintance" [Lichtenberg's unfinished "autopsychography" (Norman Alliston, 1908). A little altered. Coffee, n. break fluid. ~Author Unknown Dear people who like decaf: With all due respect, why? ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn This coffee tastes like mud! Well, it was ground this morning. ~Old Vaudeville Joke Thank you, dear coffee, for making Mondays feel a little less...Monday. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn I like my coffee strong, not lethal! ~M*A*S*H I don't have a problem with caffeine. I have a problem without caffeine! ~Author Unknown Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. ~Stephanie Piro I'm a coffee is half-full kind of girl. ~Terri Guillemets C:\COFFEE.POT missing (A)bort (R)etry (F)all asleep? ~Author Unknown If it ain't caffeinated, it ain't coffee! ~Author Unknown Coffee and tobacco are complete repose. ~Turkish Proverb When the Starbucks line is out the door, but you refuse to turn around because you're not a quitter. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee. ~Carly Simon For adrenalin junkies, coffee's aphrodisiac power is immediately evident. The drink is essentially the world's most socially acceptable stimulant. ~"Coffee — The Aphrodisiac Buzz of Caffeine," EatSomethingSexy.com In Seattle you haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. ~Jeff Bezos Herbal tea tastes so much better when it's coffee. ~Author Unknown Two wrongs do not make a right, but two cups of coffee sure as hell do! ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn Black as the devil, Hot as hell, Pure as an angel, Sweet as love. ~Charles Maurice de Talleyrand-Perigord Coffee in England is just toasted milk. ~Author Unknown Wrapping my hands around the warm mug, and inhaling, and drinking sip by sip — it is a gentle, calming, invigorating, aromatic, caffeinated meditation. ~Terri Guillemets Ultimate office automation — networked coffee machines. ~Author Unknown Has anyone else noticed that coffee is a really good listener? ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn Everybody should believe in something. I believe I'll have another coffee. ~Author Unknown Decaf is like masturbating with an oven mitt! ~Robin Williams There's something about cold mornings and hot coffee that brings Time to a crawl, until our mugs are empty then it lightning-bolts off into the waiting day. ~Terri Guillemets Coffee is not my cup of tea. ~Author Unknown Me before coffee: today is really going to be a struggle. Me after coffee: I'm the king of the world!!! ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn Caffeine is my shepherd; I shall not doze. It maketh me to wake in green pastures: It leadeth me beyond the sleeping masses. It restoreth my buzz: It leadeth me in the paths of consciousness for its name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of addiction, I will fear no Equal™: For thou art with me; thy cream and thy sugar they comfort me. Thou preparest a carafe before me in the presence of The Starbucks: Thou anointest my day with pep; my mug runneth over. Surely richness and taste shall follow me all the days of my life: And I will dwell in the House of Mochas forever. ~Author Unknown C:>COFFEE.COM error. Contact programmer J. Valdez. ~Author Unknown Coffee: The first peripheral! ~Author Unknown Coffee is ground from beans of happiness. ~Terri Guillemets If you want to improve your understanding, drink coffee. Sir James Mackintosh used to say, he believed the difference between one man and another was produced by the quantity of coffee he drank. ~Sydney Smith, quoted in A Memoir of the Reverend Sydney Smith: Volume I by his daughter Lady Saba Holland with A Selection From His Letters edited by Mrs. Austin, 1855 Hot coffee and cold winter mornings are two of the best soul mates who ever did find each other. ~Terri Guillemets Actually, this seems to be the basic need of the human heart in nearly every great crisis — a good hot cup of coffee. ~Alexander King Coffee leads men to trifle away their time, scald their chops, and spend their money, all for a little base, black, thick, nasty, bitter, stinking nauseous puddle water. ~The Women's Petition Against Coffee, 1674 I'm on coffee #5 and I suddenly want to become a motivational speaker. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn I try to stop drinking coffee each morning before the earth starts quaking beneath my feet but if restraint was at all within my abilities I'd be a water drinker. ~Terri Guillemets A cup of coffee — real coffee — home-browned, home ground, home made, that comes to you dark as a hazel-eye, but changes to a golden bronze as you temper it with cream that never cheated, but was real cream from its birth, thick, tenderly yellow, perfectly sweet, neither lumpy nor frothing on the Java: such a cup of coffee is a match for twenty blue devils and will exorcise them all. ~Henry Ward Beecher Coffee makes me invincible. But when the cup is empty, I return to mere mortal. ~Terri Guillemets It's amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee! ~Donna A. Favors I like my coffee like my women: hot, strong, steamy. ~Author Unknown But what is coffee, but a noxious berry, Born to keep used-up Londoners awake? ~Charles Stuart Calverley, "Beer," Verses and Translations, 1862 Water is the most essential element of life, because without it you can’t make coffee. ~Author Unknown I think the main ingredient in decaf coffee is disappointment. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn Retirement is one great big giant coffee break. ~Author unknown I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake. ~Lewis Black Coffee and a barista kind Prepare me for the morning grind ~Terri Guillemets My blood type is Folgers. ~Author Unknown All the coffee in Columbia won’t make me a morning person. ~Author Unknown I just realized I’m not a morning person — I’m a coffee person. ~Author Unknown Coffee fills my belly with morning rainbows of calmness and joy. ~Terri Guillemets Do I like my coffee black? There are other colors? ~Author Unknown Happiness sugars my coffee. ~Terri Guillemets I don’t understand decaf, it’s like sex without the sex. ~A.C. Van Cherub, 2008 Nothing is sad on a beautiful morning save to look down and realize you just had the last sip of coffee and the mug sits indifferently empty. ~Terri Guillemets The coffee was so strong it snarled as it lurched out of the pot. ~Betty MacDonald Don't laugh at the coffee. Some day you, too, may be old and weak. ~Author Unknown Coffee was a food in that house, not a drink. ~Patricia Hampl It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity. I bet this kind of thing does not happen to heroin addicts. I bet that when serious heroin addicts go to purchase their heroin, they do not tolerate waiting in line while some dilettante in front of them orders a hazelnut smack-a-cino with cinnamon sprinkles. ~Dave Barry Too much coffee! — the caffeine starts muttering, my mind goes stumbling, my jitters go jiggy. ~Terri Guillemets COFFEE.SYS Not Found: User startup disabled. ~Author Unknown Coffee makes us severe, and grave, and philosophical. ~Jonathan Swift Coffee smiles us into the day. ~Terri Guillemets I'd stop drinking coffee, but I'm no quitter. ~Author Unknown The voodoo priest and all his powders were as nothing compared to espresso, cappuccino, and mocha, which are stronger than all the religions of the world combined, and perhaps stronger than the human soul itself. ~Mark Helprin, Memoir from Antproof Case, 1995 RISING.SUN detected: (A)nother coffee, (C)old shower, (S)leep? ~Author Unknown Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. ~Alex Levine I'll quit coffee. It won't be easy drinking my Bailey's straight, but I'll get used to it. It'll still be the best part of waking up. ~From the television show Will and Grace I must get up. My coffee needs me. ~Author Unknown Caffeine Allocation Error: COFFEE.SYS missing, Programmer halted. ~Author Unknown if(pot.coffee=EMPTY) {programmer->;brain=OFF}; ~Author Unknown I worship at the temple of the coffee bean — and sing hymns all morn to the goddess caffeine. ~Terri Guillemets Docs? Oh, you mean the stuff you wipe up coffee with? ~Author Unknown Coffee makes dreams come true. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn Good communication is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. ~Anne Morrow Lindbergh Given enough coffee, I could rule the world. ~Author Unknown Sippin' my coffee Sippin' my happy ~Terri Guillemets I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. ~John Van Druten Ah well, a morning with weak coffee is still beaucoup better than a morning with no coffee. ~Terri Guillemets If reincarnation is a thing, then I'm pretty sure I'm coming back as a cup of coffee. ~Keith Wynn, @keithawynn
|