The Quote Garden

 I dig old books.

 Est. 1998

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Quotations about Chocolate


Chocolate is an antidepressant, which is especially useful as you start to gain weight. ~Jason Love,

Women who say getting married was the best day of their life have obviously never had 2 Kitkats fall out of a vending machine by mistake. ~Periwinkle Jones, @peachesanscream, tweet, 2014

I can hear chocolate being unwrapped, somewhere. ~Dr. SunWolf, 2012 tweet,

Chocolate is good for fighting flu-like symptoms, right? ~Keith Wynn, @ravens_rhapsody, tweet, 2016

I can honestly say that I believe I'd either be dead or in the nuthouse if it weren't for chocolate chips. Chocolate chip cookies, chocolate chip ice cream, chocolate chip muffins… I mean, as far as I'm concerned, there really isn't much need for other food. Okay, except pizza. I get really cranky if I go too long without an injection of chocolate chips. ~Rett MacPherson, Died in the Wool, 2007

Some consider carob to be a reasonable substitute for chocolate because it has some similar nutrients... and because it can — when combined with vegetable fat and sugar — be made to approximate the color and consistency of chocolate. Of course, the same arguments can also be made in favor of dirt. ~Sandra Boynton, Chocolate: The Consuming Passion, 1982,

When you can't find the silver lining, look for the chocolate lining. ~Cathy Guisewite, "Scenes From Isolation," @cathygwite, Instagram post, 2020,

*Poof!* And just like that, there are now 3 fewer chocolate caramels in the world. ~Dr. SunWolf, @WordWhispers, tweet, 2014,

Fruit only angers my need for chocolate. ~Jason Love,

Believe me, there's no metaphysics on earth like chocolates,
And all religions put together teach no more than the candy shop...
~Fernando Pessoa (1888–1935), "The Tobacco Shop," edited and translated from the Portuguese by Richard Zenith, 1998

Love?! Forget love! I’d rather fall in chocolate. ~Sandra J. Dykes, in conversation at Michelle Chocolatiers & Ice Cream in Colorado Springs, Colorado, early 1980s

I tell you... that girl is a young woman of remarkable strength of character... a girl of firmness and the courage of her convictions... she carried a box of candy home the other day without opening it. ~America, 1889

Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands — and then eat just one of the pieces. ~Judith Viorst, in Redbook, 1970s

Walks to the kitchen for a glass of water. Comes back with a bowl of M&Ms. ~Keith Wynn, @ravens_rhapsody, tweet, 2016

Tell us no more of weapon-salve,
But rather doom us to a grave,
For sure our wounds will ulcerate
Unless they're washt with Chocolate.
~Antonio Colmenero de Ledesma, "A Curious Treatise of The Nature and Quality of Chocolate," 1631, translated from the Spanish by James Wadsworth, 1640

If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control-top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated. ~Author unknown, c. 1990s

Coffee makes it possible to get out of bed. Chocolate makes it worthwhile. ~Author unknown

Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate. ~Author unknown

Frankie:  This is junior high girl drama we're talking about here, it's a minefield... Girls are horrible to each other...
Mike:  So this is just how girls are?
Frankie:  Yep.
Mike:  And there's nothing we can do?
Frankie:  No.
Mike:  Brutal. I gotta tell ya, I wouldn't last ten seconds as a girl.
Frankie:  Now you see why we eat so much chocolate?
~The Middle, "Errand Boy," 2010, written by Tim Hobert  [S2, E8]

The girl born this month will flash like a streak of yellow sunshine... She will have poetry for breakfast, and spend the rest of the day on zephyrs and chocolate caramels. ~Josh Billings, "Horoskope for July," Farmer's Allminax for the Year of Our Lord 1872  [spelling standardized —tg]

...Its Virtue is so much,
That if a Lady get a touch,
Her grief it will extenuate,
If she but smell of Chocolate.
~Antonio Colmenero de Ledesma, "A Curious Treatise of The Nature and Quality of Chocolate," 1631, translated from the Spanish by James Wadsworth, 1640

Put eat chocolate at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done. ~As quoted in The Culinarian, 2002

After about twenty years of marriage, I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of that one. And I think the answer lies somewhere between conversation and chocolate. ~Mel Gibson, 2000, about what women want

I think the two most beautiful words in the English language are chocolate macadamia. ~John Mariani, "The Seasoned Cook: How Italians Say Shanks," Esquire, 1987

If some confectioner were willing
To let the shape announce the filling,
We'd encounter fewer assorted chocs,
Bitten into and returned to the box.
~Ogden Nash (1902–1971), "Assorted Chocolates"

The rhythms of freak are ruled by the holiday calendar, and specifically by Halloween, which as we all know, can be traced back to All Hallows’ Eve, an ancient religious rite in which priests raced around the streets of Dublin throwing snack-size Snickers bars at impoverished children. ~Steve Almond, "Night of the Living Freak," Candyfreak: A Journey through the Chocolate Underbelly of America, 2004

Scoops of mint ice cream with chips of chocolate cows. ~Jim Bishop, "On the English Countryside," NY Journal-American, 1957 September 28th, quoted in Simpson's Contemporary Quotations compiled by James B. Simpson

'Twill make old women young and fresh,
Create new motions of the flesh,
And cause them long for you know what,
If they but taste of Chocolate.
~Antonio Colmenero de Ledesma, "A Curious Treatise of The Nature and Quality of Chocolate," 1631, translated from the Spanish by James Wadsworth, 1640

The nut-brown Lasses of the Land,
Whom Nature vail'd in face and hand,
Are quickly beauties of high rate,
By one small draught of Chocolate.
~Antonio Colmenero de Ledesma, "A Curious Treatise of The Nature and Quality of Chocolate," 1631, translated from the Spanish by James Wadsworth, 1640

...the last of all the colours I would wish to see there is chocolate-brown. The one drawback to chocolate is its colour. Charming to the taste, it is dull to the eye. One would never eat it if one did not know from experience that it tastes better than it looks. ~Robert Lynd, "The Chocolate Bus," Solomon in All His Glory, 1923

Chocolate is a perfect food, as wholesome as delicious, a beneficent restorer of exhausted power. It is highly nourishing and easily digested, and is fitted to repair wasted strength, preserve health, and prolong life. It agrees with those whose occupations oblige them to undergo severe mental strains and with those who give to work a portion of the time needed for sleep. It soothes both stomach and brain, and for this reason, as well as for others, it is the best friend of those engaged in literary pursuits. ~Justus, baron von Liebig (1803–1873)  [a little altered —tg]

It's a sin to waste chocolate. It's in the Bible. Ghirardelli ® 3:17. ~Terri Guillemets, "There are actually eight," 2014

The ancient Mexicans used to spend all the day and half the night in dancing with only cacao for nourishment. ~Girolamo Benzoni

...a romantic attachment for chocolate-creams... ~Grant Allen

There must be a way to make ironing less dull. Zumba ironing? Ironing Pilates? Ironing yoga? Ironing while walking?... Or an iron with a cold compartment for M&Ms. ~Donna A. Lewis, Reply All, 2016

I lied on my Weight Watchers list. I put down that I had 3 eggs… but they were Cadbury chocolate eggs. ~Caroline Rhea, unverified

Bunnies are cuddly
The large and the small
But I like chocolate ones
The best of them all.
~Author unknown

He admitted it, and I forgave him… but I still don't think a friend should eat the head off your chocolate bunny! ~Charles M. Schulz, Peanuts, 1973,  [Snoopy, of Woodstock —tg]

Families are like fudge — mostly sweet with a few nuts. ~Author unknown

Easy as eating chocolate creams... ~John Kendrick Bangs, "The Magic Sled," Bikey the Skicycle, 1902

I like funny valentines and solemn ones, with paper frills all over and a little cupid peeping out from behind a tree. I like all kinds of valentines — red and yellow, blue and pink, and especially chocolate cream color. ~John Kendrick Bangs, "Jimmieboy's Valentine," Bikey the Skicycle, 1902  [Altered, quite. —tg]

Research tells us that fourteen out of any ten individuals like chocolate. ~Sandra Boynton, Chocolate: The Consuming Passion, 1982,

Researchers have discovered that chocolate produced some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are. ~TODAY (NBC), Matt Lauer, 1999

Eat brownie then brush teeth — York peppermint patty! ~Internet meme

Relationship status: just undressed a candy bar with my eyes. ~Keith Wynn, @ravens_rhapsody, tweet, 2017

Hey, by the way, did you guys know that chocolate contains a property that triggers the release of endorphins? Gives one the feeling of being in love. ~Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, 2005, screenplay by John August, based on the 1964 book by Roald Dahl  [Willy Wonka –tg]

Marvellous chocolate —
Rich warm creamy chocolate
Intense wonderful chocolate
Dark, light, nutty, or white
Chocolate! all shapes & sizes
It's the key to delight!
~Terri Guillemets, "Marvellous chocolate," 2019, blackout poetry created from Roald Dahl, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, 1964, pages 99–104 (Puffin paperback, 2016)

Chocolate doesn't ask silly questions. Chocolate understands. ~Author unknown

Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is. ~Author unknown

Chocolate promises to make everything okay. ~Terri Guillemets

I don't drown my sorrows — I suffocate them with chocolate. ~Author unknown

There's nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with chocolate. ~Linda Grayson, unverified

Man cannot live on chocolate alone but woman sure can. ~Author unknown

I want someone to look at me the same way I look at chocolate. ~Internet meme

If there's no chocolate in Heaven, I'm not going. ~Author unknown

God gave the angels wings and humans chocolate. ~Author unknown

Party on! Today's stress has been cancelled, courtesy of chocolate. ~Terri Guillemets

The sweet bite and magical melt of pure milk chocolate — every taste takes you to a happy place... ~Lake Champlain Chocolates, 2016,

Ruth Graves Wakefield, inventor of chocolate chips — a great American hero! ~Internet meme

It is no surprise that so many of us love chocolate chips and chocolate chip desserts. A recipe that calls for a package of chips immediately seems familiar, comfortable, and doable... They make desserts better. ~Elinor Klivans, The Essential Chocolate Chip Cookbook, 2008

Don't ever let a recipe tell you how many chocolate chips to use. You measure that [$#*t] with your heart. ~Internet meme

May 15 is Chocolate Chip Day, a day to celebrate the tiny morsels of chocolate that make any dessert even better.

Chocolate is ground from the beans of happiness. ~Terri Guillemets, "Holy mocha!," 1994

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published 2000 Jun 22
revised 2021 Jul 12
last saved 2022 Oct 9