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Quotations for Investment Clubs


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NOTE:  Some of the quotes on this page were submitted to me by visitors, and not all have been verified for original source or wording. I'm working hard to confirm everything, but in the meantime please be aware of the possibility for errors.  —ღ Terri, March 2021


A dollar in the vault is worth two in the stock-market. ~"Poor Richard Junior's Philosophy," The Saturday Evening Post, 1906, George Horace Lorimer, editor


OCTOBER: This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks in. The other are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August, and February. ~Mark Twain


Here's a tip to investors: Buy airship stocks. They are sure to go up. ~"Edlets," The Spatula: An Illustrated Magazine for Pharmacists, 1919


Put not your trust in money, but put your money in trust. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes


The man who butts his head against the stock market soon learns why it is called Wall Street. ~20,000 Quips & Quotes, Evan Esar, 1968


Gentlemen prefer bonds. ~Andrew Mellon


Never invest in any idea you can't illustrate with a crayon. ~Peter Lynch


The Broker is the man who assists the Investor in going broke gracefully. ~Gideon Wurdz (Charles Wayland Towne), "Standard Oil Maxims," Foolish Finance, 1905


There's nothing wrong with the stock market that couldn't be cured by Valium-flavored fingernails. ~Robert Orben, 2400 Jokes to Brighten Your Speeches, 1984


An investor without investment objectives is like a traveler without a destination. ~Ralph Seger


The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket. ~Frank Hubbard


A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to you than the ninety and nine which you had to work for, and money won at faro or in stocks snuggles into your heart in the same way. ~Mark Twain (at Bayreuth)


A steady job and a mutual fund is still the best defense against social security. ~Author Unknown


When buying shares, ask yourself, would you buy the whole company? ~Rene Rivkin


Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells. ~J. Paul Getty


That prosperity dollar which rolled through Wall Street looked like thirty cents before it got out. ~"Poor Richard Junior's Philosophy," The Saturday Evening Post, 1903, George Horace Lorimer, editor


We all know how the size of sums of money appears to vary in a remarkable way according as they are being paid in or paid out. ~Julian Huxley, Essays of a Biologist, 1923


The economy depends about as much on economists as the weather does on weather forecasters. ~Jean-Paul Kauffmann


If man really wants but little here below he can get it by investing in trust securities. ~"Poor Richard Junior's Philosophy," The Saturday Evening Post, 1903, George Horace Lorimer, editor


I hate weekends because there is no stock market. ~Rene Rivkin


Wall Street is made up of three types of investors: bulls, bears and asses. ~20,000 Quips & Quotes, Evan Esar, 1968


Only buy something that you'd be perfectly happy to hold if the market shut down for ten years. ~Warren Buffett


The key to making money in stocks is not to get scared out of them. ~Peter Lynch


Foul-cankering rust the hidden treasure frets,
But gold that's put to use more gold begets.
~William Shakespeare, Venus and Adonis


Investors have very short memories. ~Roman Abramovich


If inflation continues to soar, you're going to have to work like a dog just to live like one. ~George Gobel


The market does not beat them. They beat themselves, because though they have brains they cannot sit tight. ~Jesse Livermore


My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income. ~Errol Flynn


If all the economists in this country were laid end to end, they would never reach a conclusion. ~Author unknown


You can never predict when that unknown torpedo will come out of the dark and smash the price of a stock. ~Ralph Seger


We simply attempt to be fearful when others are greedy and to be greedy only when others are fearful. ~Warren Buffett


Many a man is badly burned in the stock market by picking up a hot tip. ~20,000 Quips & Quotes, Evan Esar, 1968


Goodness is the only investment that never fails. ~Henry David Thoreau


People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage. ~Doug Larson


I'm tired of Love: I'm still more tired of Rhyme.
But Money gives me pleasure all the time.
~Hilaire Belloc, "Fatigued," Sonnets and Verse, 1923


In the old days a man who saved money was a miser; nowadays he's a wonder. ~Author Unknown


A nickel ain't worth a dime anymore. ~Yogi Berra


STOCKS  An unreliable commodity bought and sold by gamblers. If you win, it's an investment; if you lose, a speculation. ~Charles Wayland Towne, The Foolish Dictionary, Executed by Gideon Wurdz, Master of Pholly, Doctor of Loquacious Lunacy, etc., 1904


One way to end up with $1 million is to start with $2 million and use technical analysis. ~Ralph Seger


An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Benjamin Franklin


When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is. ~Oscar Wilde


A bank book makes good reading — better than some novels. ~Harry Lauder


Just as a cautious businessman avoids investing all his capital in one concern, so wisdom would probably admonish us also not to anticipate all our happiness from one quarter alone. ~Sigmund Freud


Money can't buy happiness, but it can buy you the kind of misery you prefer. ~Author Unknown


He never clipped a coupon for he never owned a stock;
He never had a bank account—not even in a sock;
He never was mistaken for a putter-by of wealth—
His int'rest came in sunshine and his dividends in health.
~Author unknown, "The Happy Investor," 1914


Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. ~Woody Allen


Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. ~Robert Orben


The best way to make a thousand dollars in the stock market is to start with five thousand and quit when you've only lost four. ~20,000 Quips & Quotes, Evan Esar, 1968


Inflation hasn't ruined everything. A dime can still be used as a screwdriver. ~Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.


Wealth — any income that is at least one hundred dollars more a year than the income of one's wife's sister's husband. ~H.L. Mencken


If the nation's economists were laid end to end, they would point in all directions. ~Arthur H. Motley


By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. ~Author Unknown


Those who are unwilling to invest in the future haven't earned one. ~H.W. Lewis, Technological Risk, 1990


Do not value money for any more nor any less than its worth; it is a good servant but a bad master. ~Alexandre Dumas fils, Camille, 1852


That money talks
I'll not deny,
I heard it once:
It said, "Goodbye."
~Richard Armour


Invest a few moments in thinking. It will pay good interest. ~Author Unknown


There is something fascinating about science. One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact. ~Mark Twain


Literature is an investment of genius which has dividends to all subsequent times. ~John Burroughs


Women prefer men who have something tender about them — especially the legal kind. ~Kay Ingram


I'm opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position. ~Mark Twain, The American Claimant



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